There is no escaping the fact planning a wedding can and will at some point become stressful and overwhelming, even if you’re having a small and intimate celebration. Well intentioned family and friends will want to share their opinions and ask questions making you doubt your decisions. You’ll be managing various moving parts and coordinating all parties involved from the venue and suppliers, right through to your wedding party and guests. Essentially wedding planning is project management, event planning with a good dose of relationship management (both personal and professional!) thrown in for good measure.

As a professional wedding planner, I’m a big believer in being prepared and as the saying goes; ‘fail to plan, plan to fail’. So with this in mind I wanted to talk honestly about what you can expect in the final week running up to your wedding day. A lot happens in those last few days and I believe it’s important to highlight what can be a particularly stressful time during the planning. Having been a bride myself I have experience on both sides so I hope my advice will go some way to helping you deal with those last minute demands!

Reconfirm the details of your wedding day itinerary/schedule

You ideally want to do this no later than a week ahead of your wedding day, earlier if possible. Contact your venue and suppliers to ensure all times and specific information relevant to them is confirmed. If you don’t have a wedding planner to do this and you’re not sure about putting together a clear timeline for your wedding day, it’s worth speaking with your venue coordinator, caterer, or photographer for guidance to ensure you’ve allowed enough time for each part of the day.

Designate your ‘go to’ person/people to help manage the load

Invariably you will be managing A LOT in the final week ahead of your wedding and this will be both physically and mentally draining. You need to ensure you have at least one other person (ideally more) you can both rely on to help support you. Generally speaking this is usually a trusted member of the wedding party and they should know just as much about the plans for the day as you. This means they can help deal with the usual last-minute questions from guests and help divert some of the ‘noise’ away from you.

Packing what you need for the wedding… and honeymoon

Most couples will have a number of items they need to ensure are packed and handed over to the venue before the wedding. This tends to be items like the guest book, place names, table names/numbers, the table plan and various other decor items to be included as part of their styling for the wedding. When doing so be sure to make a list of what you’re providing to the venue, that way you can tick off what you pack as you go. You also need to do the same when it comes to your overnight bag (if applicable) as well as making sure you have everything organised for going on honeymoon if you’re leaving shortly after the wedding.

Feeling like you’ve forgotten something… constantly

As a bride, I remember vividly spending the near 3-hour drive to our venue days before our wedding thinking we’d forgotten something. That’s it. I don’t remember the stunning scenery, the excited chatter of my young stepsons in the back of the car going on an adventure. I remember going over and over in my head all that we had packed, convinced we’d forgotten something. Had we forgotten anything? Nope! But I still couldn’t shake that feeling. Having clear planning lists of what you need to do will help here, but chances are some doubt will always end up creeping in regardless!

Accept you may well feel on edge and not yourself

Wedding planning is a big undertaking and on average you will have been working towards this day for about 18 months or so and you’re now on the final stretch. Come this point you and your partner will have invested a lot of time, energy and money so it’s perfectly natural to be excited, nervous, anxious, relieved and a bit all over the place emotionally! Be kind to yourself and if you do have a wobble and need to vent or perhaps overreact during this time, then get it off your chest and be gracious enough to apologise if you need to afterward. You’re human after all and by stressing out about not getting stressed you’re doing no one any favours. Accept it will most likely happen and it’s okay!

There’s more to do than you realise… delegate!

You and your other half cannot possibly do EVERYTHING in the run-up to your wedding. Fact. Actually, scrap that, maybe you can but you’ll be so knackered come the big day you won’t enjoy it. Therefore delegate, delegate, delegate! If you don’t have a wedding planner then your wedding party should absolutely be called upon to assist. They are your crack team of helpers and you shouldn’t be afraid to assign them tasks to help reduce your own to do list.

Final outfits checks

Try your dress, suit or kilt on to ensure it fits and all items and accessories are where they should be and nothing is missing. Also, take the time to break in your wedding shoes if you haven’t worn them before. A lot of couples forget to do this and before they even get halfway through the day their feet are killing them and in some instances covered in blisters… not a good look!

Checking the weather forecast. Every. Single. Minute.

This tends to be an even bigger focus if you’re planning to have an outdoor ceremony or drinks reception. YOU CANNOT CONTROL THE WEATHER SO LET IT GO. It really is as simple as that. There is absolutely nothing you can do on this one, no lists, no delegating or helpers can change what the weather will do on your wedding day. All you can do is hope for the best but have a backup plan in place should the weather decide not to play ball. Or if you’re absolutely determined to get married outside regardless, be ready to embrace whatever the weather brings!

There is no such thing as a ‘perfect day’

Something will go wrong, it might be small and something only you notice or it might be big for everyone to see. Like your cake falling over when you’re cutting it… which is exactly what happened to me on my wedding day. True story! Do I look back gutted my day wasn’t ‘perfect’? Not a chance! For the simple reason, there is no such thing. Your day will be as ‘perfect’ as you allow it to be, even when something goes wrong! My cake-cutting photos are some of my favourites from our day and when it happened I couldn’t stop laughing… just like our guests!

Letting go and remembering what it’s all about

You will reach a point usually the day before or morning of when you simply let go and focus on what this whole wedding planning malarkey has been about. To make a lifetime commitment to the one you love. There is nothing more you can do, the lists have been ticked off and responsibilities delegated… time to switch off from planning mode and enjoy your wedding day, taking the time to be present and relax!

What No One Tells You About the Final Week Before Your wedding…